... Except he got sent off instead! Oh how I wish I could’ve laughed but it wasn’t appropriate!

I’ve been to Winchester to watch this Zidane “film”. Basically, just a load of cameras focussed on Zidane during a match: Real Madrid vs Villarreal in April ‘05.

Zinedine Zidane: A 21st-Century Portrait is based on a gloriously simple and audacious idea. To train the camera on the great footballer over the course of a single match: 90 minutes, in real time. On the ball, and mostly off the ball: just Zidane. Gordon occasionally inserts TV coverage clips for context but otherwise the camera remains on Zidane and his face, as gaunt and impassive as an Easter Island statue, massively dignified in the deafening cauldron of noise. He runs; he frowns; he pants; he spits. He is always watchful. Occasionally, he bursts into action.

Guess why I went to see that?

I wasn’t dragged there kicking and screaming though. I was ever so slightly interested in it. It’s not like I need an excuse to watch a football match..!

Even if it’s a match from the weirdest of angles.

I’ve seen football on the TV, I’ve seen football from a stadium, and now, I’ve seen football from the point of view of.. Well.. Zidane.. except he can’t see himself obviously.

And, to be honest it wasn’t that bad! I wouldn’t recommend it to my mum. But it didn’t send me to sleep like I’d predicted on the way there.

I’m not going to go on about it, I’ll leave that to ViEiRA. But I will say that now I’ve watched this I can quite honestly say that she will never ever get me to fancy Zidane, she’s been trying her hardest but if watching that from start to finish isn’t going to do it. Nothing ever will!

So I’m safe.

We also discussed that it would be a fab idea to make a series of these things, instead of just a one off film. Next week they can do Gigi Buffon. I’d love to see a goalie just standing around for a bit and suddenly having to throw himself to the ground.

I won’t mention the Skittles we consumed.. But cinemas are appropriate places for junk consumption so it's all fine..!!

I should actually be listing my mother’s entire wardrobe on eBay right now.

But decided to have a little shop on there instead.

My latest purchase?

My mum says “Who is Freddie Lunganbery?”

She also said “Oh you’ll have to be careful not to lose your keys as they’ll be sent to him instead.”

Shame that I’d have to go and get them back off him then wouldn’t it..